LEAD STORY 10
Well managers and managerettes,, we have officially reached that time where playoff spots are being determined, as a couple teams are locks, several are still in the hunt, and then there's Peggy Leggy. More on that later. LOL....
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With three weeks left in the regular season, its time for the Corral to take a look around and see what the playoff landscape looks like as of now....
PADLOCKED IN
HAIL2DAPLAYOFFS aka MELVIN NOBODY has secured a spot in the playoffs with his current 9-2 record. Melly Mel raced out to the lead from the get-go and has never relinquished first place in the league standings. At this point, he is just trying to for a 12-win season. BUT.... his real sights for now is to stay in first place in the standings, with three games remaining... because............................
BIG PLANZ (8-3) is breathing down MellyMel's neck, and is in position to take over first place within the next three weeks. Vegas bettors are NOT counting on Planz catching MellyMel. The remaining strength of schedule greatly favors Melly as he faces three 4-7 teams (Peggy, KC, and Maddog) while Planz faces Mikey (5-6), SkyCrys (4-7) and JBuns (6-5). At worst, Planz goes 2-1 while Mel goes 3-0 and wins the season title.
A MUDDLED MESS
Here is where things get shaky. Six teams tied or at most within a game of each other. The next three weeks will really shake this 6-5/5-6 gridlock. The O.C. started the season in the Top 3 of the league, but a 5-game losing streak has plummeted him to 7th place, hanging on by a fingernail to the playoff mix. Mikey "Holdin'HisBeer" started off in the basement but has slowly risen to playoff contention, holding that 6th place spot tighter than he holds a beer can!! He's currently in a 2-game tailspin and desparately needs a win this week to keep pace. B'moreKidd (who we STILL HAVE ZERO IDEA WHO THAT IS) remain in the mix with his 5-6 record. Meanwhile, JungleBunz and Diggs rest atop of the heap with matching 6-5 records, separated only by accumulated points.
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All of this will definitely change over the next three weeks with each of these teams having to face one or more of the teams they are battling it out with. As far as strength of schedule goes, NONE of these teams face MellyMel in the next three weeks, but Mikey still has to play BigPlanz this week, and JungleBunz has BigPlanz in Week 14. Those are two games that could ultimately determine how things end for Bunz and Mikey.
STILL BREATHING at 4-7..............
We have to start with PeggyLeggy (4-7), who is currently riding a 3-game winning streak. If she keeps this up, she just might end up getting a seat at the Playoff Table. We're guessing that she needs to end the season with 7 wins to have a realistic shot at the playoffs. It can be done. The Corral staff is rooting for LeggyPeggy to pull off what would be an incredible feat..... Meanwhile, KC'sNoStars jumped out to a first place start but has met with a few timely losses and finds themselves having to probably win out to have a shot of making the playoffs. The Evil Empire and MadDog20/20 are still hanging on to life, but like Peggy and KC, they can't afford more than one loss over the next three weeks to have a shooters chance at the playoffs. The problem is that these teams can't ALL GO 3-0 in the next three weeks simply because they have to play each other over that time. OUCH!!! By the time we reach Week 14, the playoff race will be much clearer, as its a good bet some teams will be in a WIN OR GO HOME situation by then.....
BEING PETTY (POINTS)
Hmmmmm............... After proofreading this article, I thiink we remained PETTY FREE this time........ See ya next week.... lol
lead story 9!!
Hello Everyone and Welcome to this week's edition of The Corral. We know that you have been waiting for your weekly fix, so apologies for going AWOL the last two weeks..... However, life sometimes eclipses this thing called Fantasy football and for those reasons, there has not been a Corral. Life happened....... So here we go....
FIRST AND FOREMOST.......
Speaking on behalf of ALLLLL the league managers, our sincere condolences to Micheal Gonzales and his wife Peggy on the loss of his father recently. NWSL is not real life, although at times we act as if it is. However, it is made of of real people. People that have developed a bond over 20 years, and Mikey has been one of those people since Season 1. Our collective hearts go out to him and his family. We all await the time when he and his family reconnect with his father in the not to distant future, via the New World. Our prayers are most certainly with you Mikey.
Its difficult to do a comedic article on the heels of such a loss. Out of respect for the Gonzales', we took a little break.
second down......
Congratulations to Tony Slydell, aka FireMarshallBill aka DiggyDooRight on the birth of his first grandchild, Miles. Yes, Diggs is officially old. He's a grandpa. Another recent life occurance. We're sure that Miles already has a burgundy and gold swaddling blanket, and a crappy Commodores jersey that says "I came Into The World and all I got was this Ugly Jersey". No worries Miles. Your Uncle Commish will be sending you a blue and silver Cowboy jersey, autographed by Cedarion Lamb. LOL
THIRD down......
No excuses, but life be lifin'... as the young folks say. Part of life is health, and health issues have made it such that we missed a couple weeks of publishing The Corral. I'm sure daKidd thought it was because he beat The O.C. (handily I might add) last week, but that is far from the case. Its hard to write when you have a nasty virus, compounded with not being able to see out of one eye. The virus is now gone and the eye injections are slowly starting to restore my vision and hopefully in the next few months, my vision will be sharp again. But, rest assured The Corral will be back in effect this week. We got some major games coming up starting tomorrow.
THE LEAD STORY 8!!
SOME THINGS CHANGE, OTHERS REMAIN THE SAME
Lets just kickstart this Corral by sending everyone a message from the great writers on the Corral staff of one. In the now infamous words of Jerry Jones, Owner and defunct GM of the defense-less Allas Cowboys, "I could be fixing our horrendous defense but I'm on the phone with you guys cause I have billion dollar oil wells to manage". Cowboy Nation interpreted that as Jerry saying "I could be fixing our crappy defense but I got other things of more importance to do". Those words earlier this week set Cowboy nation ablaze as Jerry once again found yet another way to put his size 11 Florsheim's into his mouth......
We at the Corral, want to remind you all that we hear (read) all the comments on the feed from you managers wondering if the Corral will put out another article, or if the Corral is hiding because of (another) loss, or if the Corral has gone rouge and writes for another league. In the words of Jerry, we say to you, "We could be writing a new article but I'm on the phone with you guys cause I have a staggering medical bill to pay that my assets don't justify paying." So we say to you managers: We could be writing another article but we got other things of more importance to do".
But, just like Jerry loves stirring the pot and creating so-called relevance, it appears from the comments on the group feed that you guys find The Corral to be relevant. U want it. U love it. "U need us on that wall" LOL LOL
(only some of you will catch that last line. LOL)
OK, on to last weeks action, and just in time before Sunday kicks off an hour later due to the time zone changes.
SOME THINGS STAY THE SAME...............
WomanHoldMyBeerAndWatchMeWin 210
PeggyLeggyHeldHisBeers 135
Nothing like having a supportive wife! A wife that will iron your shirts, press your pants, make your enchiladas, listen to you ramble on and on during family worship AND hold your beers while you whip up on her team by nearly 100 points. Yes, PeggyLeggy lost. Again. SAME as before x6. (times six) How does Mikey win by nearly 100 when he has a WR that only scored 2 points and a defense that only racked up 6? Because he had Micheal Jordan, oops, sorry, Jordan Love with a ridiculous 70-burger. Leggy's crew had no answer for that Monday night assault and now rests comfortably at the bottom of the league ocean at 1-7. BUT.... to her credit, she supported her man, helping him move up to 6th place and a shot at making the playoffs.
HailHurtsToThaLosers 237
Jungle Baked Buns 193
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In the catagory of SAME, Melvin's Victors racked up another win in easy fashion and is now the runaway train as the season rumbles on. Jungle Buns found out that hail2daHead hurts, as he was pummeled with hailstones by 44 points. Even though Melvin's QB Jalen HURTS registered 49 points, thats not the hailstones that hurt Buns the most. It was Jonathan Taylor (61) and the Tampa defense (51) that pelted the Buns to their ultimate defeat. Heck, Melvin let his kicker take the day off, but clearly had enough frozen ice stones to beat down the Buns..... Yep, Buns found out that hail hurts to the losers!!!
FireMarshallBill 225
TheSkyHasFallen 164
In the catagory of SAME, Moody lost. Yet again. And we love it. The LordOfTheRings is about as irrevelent as the New England Patriots, despite all their rings. Mood boasts a NFL All-Star trifecta of Josh Allen, Justin Jefferson and Devonta Smith that he felt after draft night was going to put him in prime position to hoist another trophy. Not to mention the Cleveland defense.... Yet, all they have managed to hoist is 2 wins in 8 tries. Only PeggyLeggy blocks MooMoo from occupying low rent basement property. hehehehehe..... In the famous words of Janet Jackson... "gimme a BEAT!!!" We're sure that DJ Moody knows that song!!!!!! 6 teams have given him just that!!! Lets give some love to DiggideeDooRag. His crew got 51 from Bo "KnowsTheCowboysHaveNoDefense" Nix, who had the opportunity to rack up numbers (as does anyone else) by playing against the defenseless Cowboys. James Cook blazed out a crazy 58 points on the ground. Those 109 points combined clearly made life difficult for the Moodster............. heheheheheheheehe
B'More Kid 179
The O.C. 136
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From the catagory of CHANGE, the O.C. has now lost 2 consecutive games and has slid down the rankings to fourth place with a 5-3 record, tied with (arrggggghhhhh) Diggidee and just a game ahead of (say it ain't sooooo) HoldMyBeerO.C.
We clearly blame Dakota Rayne Prescott for this loss as he posted his worst game of the season with a measly 26 points. If Dakota hits his average (50 pts), we win that game. We would have more to report from the B'More Kid camp, but..... again, we don't even know who he/she is.
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Another from the catagory of CHANGE is
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KC No/Stars 264
TinyPlans 215
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Tiny House. Tiny Desk. Tiny Plans. KC and her NO Stars beat up on a tiny team to actually win a game. Thats a change! TinyPlans lost a game. THAT'S A BIG CHANGE. OK, lets be honest. TinyPlans actually isn't so tiny. He resides in second place in the standings and had it not been for Cam SkatCataBoo only logging 10 pionts before suffering a gruesome season ending injury and Alvin Kamara virtually taking the day off (6 pts) Tiny would likely have won. BUT those things come with the territory so TinyPlans (for THIS article) looks to get back to his winning ways starting tomorrow....
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BEING (PETTY POINTS)
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CHECK YOUR FACTS:
We're putting this last game in our Petty Betty file simply because it involves DaKidd. DaKidd went on the group chat with the audacity to call out the Corral for not having posted this version of the Corral. His famous words were the Corral hadn't been posted because "he just losing now as usual!" To Mr. Kidd, we say "Sir, look at the standings. If you look UP six spots, you will find us." Not to shabby for someone that is "losing as usual"...... By the way, daKidd aka Uncle BoKnowsLosing lost again this week.... .but we not gonna waste space detailing that...... HEY LOOK MA!! daKidds playing the OC this week!! Wonder how thats gonna turn out!!!
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74 PETTY POINTS
Mikey's 74 point win was the biggest blowout of the week. We can't quite recall who he was playing but we kinda think she's still standing in the kitchen holding his beer cans......... heheehehhe
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Do you know that Maddog posted a 75-point win in Week 5, which went down as the largest point margin for that week? Guess who it was against? We won't put HER out there but her initials are P.L.
REVISIONIST kiddSTORY
Since daKidd likes to share his thoughts on the feed about the Corral and the OC's UsualLosing, here's another petty point. In Week 2, daKidd got smoked by 69 points by JungleBuns, the largest margin of defeat for that week. He followed that up in Week 3 by getting shallacked by BMoreKid by a staggering 105 points, which goes down currently as the second LARGEST margin of defeat this season. The largest margin of defeat this season (116 points) goes to FireMarshallBill.... (hehehehehe) We just thought daKidd might like to make a note of that b4 posting about "usual losing".....
Until next week.......... Corral. Out.
REV
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THE LEAD STORY 8!!
SOME THINGS CHANGE, OTHERS REMAIN THE SAME
Lets just kickstart this Corral by sending everyone a message from the great writers on the Corral staff of one. In the now infamous words of Jerry Jones, Owner and defunct GM of the defense-less Allas Cowboys, "I could be fixing our horrendous defense but I'm on the phone with you guys cause I have billion dollar oil wells to manage". Cowboy Nation interpreted that as Jerry saying "I could be fixing our crappy defense but I got other things of more importance to do". Those words earlier this week set Cowboy nation ablaze as Jerry once again found yet another way to put his size 11 Florsheim's into his mouth......
We at the Corral, want to remind you all that we hear (read) all the comments on the feed from you managers wondering if the Corral will put out another article, or if the Corral is hiding because of (another) loss, or if the Corral has gone rouge and writes for another league. In the words of Jerry, we say to you, "We could be writing a new article but I'm on the phone with you guys cause I have a staggering medical bill to pay that my assets don't justify paying." So we say to you managers: We could be writing another article but we got other things of more importance to do".
But, just like Jerry loves stirring the pot and creating so-called relevance, it appears from the comments on the group feed that you guys find The Corral to be relevant. U want it. U love it. "U need us on that wall" LOL LOL
(only some of you will catch that last line. LOL)
OK, on to last weeks action, and just in time before Sunday kicks off an hour later due to the time zone changes.
SOME THINGS STAY THE SAME...............
WomanHoldMyBeerAndWatchMeWin 210
PeggyLeggyHeldHisBeers 135
Nothing like having a supportive wife! A wife that will iron your shirts, press your pants, make your enchiladas, listen to you ramble on and on during family worship AND hold your beers while you whip up on her team by nearly 100 points. Yes, PeggyLeggy lost. Again. SAME as before x6. (times six) How does Mikey win by nearly 100 when he has a WR that only scored 2 points and a defense that only racked up 6? Because he had Micheal Jordan, oops, sorry, Jordan Love with a ridiculous 70-burger. Leggy's crew had no answer for that Monday night assault and now rests comfortably at the bottom of the league ocean at 1-7. BUT.... to her credit, she supported her man, helping him move up to 6th place and a shot at making the playoffs.
HailHurtsToThaLosers 237
Jungle Baked Buns 193
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In the catagory of SAME, Melvin's Victors racked up another win in easy fashion and is now the runaway train as the season rumbles on. Jungle Buns found out that hail2daHead hurts, as he was pummeled with hailstones by 44 points. Even though Melvin's QB Jalen HURTS registered 49 points, thats not the hailstones that hurt Buns the most. It was Jonathan Taylor (61) and the Tampa defense (51) that pelted the Buns to their ultimate defeat. Heck, Melvin let his kicker take the day off, but clearly had enough frozen ice stones to beat down the Buns..... Yep, Buns found out that hail hurts to the losers!!!
FireMarshallBill 225
TheSkyHasFallen 164
In the catagory of SAME, Moody lost. Yet again. And we love it. The LordOfTheRings is about as irrevelent as the New England Patriots, despite all their rings. Mood boasts a NFL All-Star trifecta of Josh Allen, Justin Jefferson and Devonta Smith that he felt after draft night was going to put him in prime position to hoist another trophy. Not to mention the Cleveland defense.... Yet, all they have managed to hoist is 2 wins in 8 tries. Only PeggyLeggy blocks MooMoo from occupying low rent basement property. hehehehehe..... In the famous words of Janet Jackson... "gimme a BEAT!!!" We're sure that DJ Moody knows that song!!!!!! 6 teams have given him just that!!! Lets give some love to DiggideeDooRag. His crew got 51 from Bo "KnowsTheCowboysHaveNoDefense" Nix, who had the opportunity to rack up numbers (as does anyone else) by playing against the defenseless Cowboys. James Cook blazed out a crazy 58 points on the ground. Those 109 points combined clearly made life difficult for the Moodster............. heheheheheheheehe
B'More Kid 179
The O.C. 136
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From the catagory of CHANGE, the O.C. has now lost 2 consecutive games and has slid down the rankings to fourth place with a 5-3 record, tied with (arrggggghhhhh) Diggidee and just a game ahead of (say it ain't sooooo) HoldMyBeerO.C.
We clearly blame Dakota Rayne Prescott for this loss as he posted his worst game of the season with a measly 26 points. If Dakota hits his average (50 pts), we win that game. We would have more to report from the B'More Kid camp, but..... again, we don't even know who he/she is.
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Another from the catagory of CHANGE is
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KC No/Stars 264
TinyPlans 215
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Tiny House. Tiny Desk. Tiny Plans. KC and her NO Stars beat up on a tiny team to actually win a game. Thats a change! TinyPlans lost a game. THAT'S A BIG CHANGE. OK, lets be honest. TinyPlans actually isn't so tiny. He resides in second place in the standings and had it not been for Cam SkatCataBoo only logging 10 pionts before suffering a gruesome season ending injury and Alvin Kamara virtually taking the day off (6 pts) Tiny would likely have won. BUT those things come with the territory so TinyPlans (for THIS article) looks to get back to his winning ways starting tomorrow....
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BEING (PETTY POINTS)
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CHECK YOUR FACTS:
We're putting this last game in our Petty Betty file simply because it involves DaKidd. DaKidd went on the group chat with the audacity to call out the Corral for not having posted this version of the Corral. His famous words were the Corral hadn't been posted because "he just losing now as usual!" To Mr. Kidd, we say "Sir, look at the standings. If you look UP six spots, you will find us." Not to shabby for someone that is "losing as usual"...... By the way, daKidd aka Uncle BoKnowsLosing lost again this week.... .but we not gonna waste space detailing that...... HEY LOOK MA!! daKidds playing the OC this week!! Wonder how thats gonna turn out!!!
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74 PETTY POINTS
Mikey's 74 point win was the biggest blowout of the week. We can't quite recall who he was playing but we kinda think she's still standing in the kitchen holding his beer cans......... heheehehhe
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Do you know that Maddog posted a 75-point win in Week 5, which went down as the largest point margin for that week? Guess who it was against? We won't put HER out there but her initials are P.L.
REVISIONIST kiddSTORY
Since daKidd likes to share his thoughts on the feed about the Corral and the OC's UsualLosing, here's another petty point. In Week 2, daKidd got smoked by 69 points by JungleBuns, the largest margin of defeat for that week. He followed that up in Week 3 by getting shallacked by BMoreKid by a staggering 105 points, which goes down currently as the second LARGEST margin of defeat this season. The largest margin of defeat this season (116 points) goes to FireMarshallBill.... (hehehehehe) We just thought daKidd might like to make a note of that b4 posting about "usual losing".....
Until next week.......... Corral. Out.
REV
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THE LEAD STORY 6!!
houston, we have....
(Houston was) a problem!!!
Yea. Yea. Yea. This is to the Mikeys, daKiddies, the Peggy's and the others that thought that the Corral would be closed this week. We heard yall yappin' all the way out here in Dallas. "Where's the Corral this week? Are we gonna get a Corral following a loss by The O.C.? Well, the answer is a resounding YES. We take our losses, oops, loss, like a champ. The presses continue to run. Let's get to it...
MADDOG 20/20 169
The O.C. 149
This game was NOT the PrimeTime Game of the Week. Not when you have a 5-1 team playing what was a 1-5 team. This game was rightly slotted in the noon game slot, when all the friends are at the meeting or watching water polo on the Polo Network. BUT, THIS SHOULD HAVE BEEN the Primetime Game of the Week. MadDog 20/20 pulled off a STUNNER of a win in what may go down as the game that turns his season around. Yes, The O.C. got the typical stellar numbers from MVP-caliber QB Dakota Rayne Prescott, who put up 54 points. One of the problems was that the rest of his team left their cleats and their game, at home. A zero from Garrett. 6 points from Rome "Wasn't Built To Play On This Day" Oduze, a measly 5 from Hunter and another piddly 5 from Sam LaPorta. And even then, this game was not decided until late Monday night, during the 3rd and 4th quarter in a duel between O.C's "I'll have a Chardoney" and MadDogs "Houston, We Have a Defense". Houston provided the knockout blow, slurping down the Chardoney like a partaker at the Memor....... (oh well, U get the point), 46-21. That Houston defense was crushing it Monday night. 2 Interceptions, 2 fumble recoveries, 2 sacks, a blocked kick, a TD (really???)... and boo-kuu return yards. They scored in EVERY IMAGINABLE WAY!! Each time Seattle had the ball, the Houston defense showed up and showed out!! Each time they scored, the MadDog Chiwawa fans were throwing tacos on the field!! That H-TOWN defense was a HUGE PROBLEM!!! MadDog jump starts his seaon with a huge win and The O.C takes it on the chin for the first time in 4 weeks...... They say that every dog has his day. This was MadDogs day......... Yo Quiero taco bell... Taco's for EVERYBODY!!
IN OTHER ACTION...​
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Hail2daVictors 276
Moody's SkyIsFallin' 212
We can't even mess with Melvin and his Victors. We have to call them by their proper name as they continue their stranglehold on first place. The Ohio Players/Victors pummeled the Evil Empire 276-212, sending the Empire crashing further into irrelevance... or is it oblivion??? Whatever MikeTyson said. LOL LOL.. Melvin has a winning team but we are more excited that Moody has a LOSING TEAM. LordOfDaRings is just ONE rung above LeggyPeggy for last place supremacy!! Awwwwww... That was so wrong. We shouldn't talk about Peggy like that!! My bad...... hehehehehe
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HoldMyBeers 160
HoldMyWhiskey 150
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Mikey outscored PeggyLeggy 160-150 this weekend, with Jared Golf leading the way with 25 points.... 25 points from a starting QB?????? Thats crazy.. Oh wait... What's even crazier is that Mikey outscored LeggyPeggy by 10 points, but unfortunately, they weren't even playing against each other. They play NEXT WEEK!! Oh well..... Maybe Peggy will do better next week... In other news, Mikey did actually score 160 points and his Queen actually scored a buck fiddy this week. But.... as they tend to do, they both lost. Oh well, one of them will win next week!! That we can definitively say... But wait, maybe not. They could tie!! Ask Green Bay and Dallas!! Ouch......
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daKidd 240
KC NoStars 196
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Say it ain't so???? DaKidd wins his THIRD game in a row, with a easy cruise over KC NoStars 240-196. What is going on up in HERE??? KiddiePoo has quietly edged his way up to eighth place in the standings. Which brings us to, our next segment.....................
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(being) PETTY POINTS
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BAD COMPANY
The KC-NoStars started the season on top of the mountain but my, my my have the mighty fallen. They are now kickin' it with the likes of MadDog 20/20 aka "Yo Quiero Taco Bell" and The Evil Empire at 2-5. and just a tobacco spit from PeggyLeggy at 1-6. (oops sorry Peggy. My bad) It's no wonder Yaz aka JerryJones and her partner StevieJones are currently seeking solace in the Tennessee mountains..... And speaking of "how the mighty have fallen.........................
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CRY, MOODY, CRYYYYYYYY!!!
Whats a better story? daKidd's 3-game winning streak OR NYSkyCries 4-game LOSING streak? Do yall realize that his current 4-game streak of coming up short in the points catagory is the LONGEST current streak in the league? In the now famous words of comic legend Bernie Mac "Moody. You ain't nuthin'. U ain't got nuthin' . U won't be nuthin. All you do is play records!!" LOL LOL LOL (Only a few of you will get that. Its a line from a movie. Jungle Buns definitely gets this!!) Soooooo, our suggestion to Moody is that he have his wife, a Philly native and die-hard Eagle fan, get on his DJ turntable and play that nauseating Eagle victory song "Fly Eagles Fly" but remix it to say "Cry, Moody Cryyyyyy!!!!
IN OTHER NEWS....
Peggy Leggy lost. Again. Ooopss.. Sorry Peggy. I think we already mentioned this. My bad.... LOL
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CURRENT PLANS
BigPlanz is currently in second place but, tied for first with Melvin's Victors at 6-1. Planz would get more press coverage from us, but .... to be honest... we don't even know who he (or she) is. We have no data on this manager. It is a brother or a sister? Is the manager anointed or staying here on earth with the rest of us? Is the manager black, white, blue or Mikey? lol lol... Well, wait, the jury is still out on Mikey. He acts Latino, but we think he's mixed!! LOL
DA ORIGINAL PEGGY LEGGY
Some of you may know this, most probably don't. Some may wonder why The Corral has dubbed Peggy aka Peggy's notSoMighty Team as Peggy Leggy. The original Peggy Leggy appeared in the 1974 movie "Uptown Saturday Night". See link below.....
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more #pettypoints next week! Go Peggy!!!
AND
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THE LEAD STORY 6!!
houston, we have....
(Houston was) a problem!!!
Yea. Yea. Yea. This is to the Mikeys, daKiddies, the Peggy's and the others that thought that the Corral would be closed this week. We heard yall yappin' all the way out here in Dallas. "Where's the Corral this week? Are we gonna get a Corral following a loss by The O.C.? Well, the answer is a resounding YES. We take our losses, oops, loss, like a champ. The presses continue to run. Let's get to it...
MADDOG 20/20 169
The O.C. 149
This game was NOT the PrimeTime Game of the Week. Not when you have a 5-1 team playing what was a 1-5 team. This game was rightly slotted in the noon game slot, when all the friends are at the meeting or watching water polo on the Polo Network. BUT, THIS SHOULD HAVE BEEN the Primetime Game of the Week. MadDog 20/20 pulled off a STUNNER of a win in what may go down as the game that turns his season around. Yes, The O.C. got the typical stellar numbers from MVP-caliber QB Dakota Rayne Prescott, who put up 54 points. One of the problems was that the rest of his team left their cleats and their game, at home. A zero from Garrett. 6 points from Rome "Wasn't Built To Play On This Day" Oduze, a measly 5 from Hunter and another piddly 5 from Sam LaPorta. And even then, this game was not decided until late Monday night, during the 3rd and 4th quarter in a duel between O.C's "I'll have a Chardoney" and MadDogs "Houston, We Have a Defense". Houston provided the knockout blow, slurping down the Chardoney like a partaker at the Memor....... (oh well, U get the point), 46-21. That Houston defense was crushing it Monday night. 2 Interceptions, 2 fumble recoveries, 2 sacks, a blocked kick, a TD (really???)... and boo-kuu return yards. They scored in EVERY IMAGINABLE WAY!! Each time Seattle had the ball, the Houston defense showed up and showed out!! Each time they scored, the MadDog Chiwawa fans were throwing tacos on the field!! That H-TOWN defense was a HUGE PROBLEM!!! MadDog jump starts his seaon with a huge win and The O.C takes it on the chin for the first time in 4 weeks...... They say that every dog has his day. This was MadDogs day......... Yo Quiero taco bell... Taco's for EVERYBODY!!
IN OTHER ACTION...​
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Hail2daVictors 276
Moody's SkyIsFallin' 212
We can't even mess with Melvin and his Victors. We have to call them by their proper name as they continue their stranglehold on first place. The Ohio Players/Victors pummeled the Evil Empire 276-212, sending the Empire crashing further into irrelevance... or is it oblivion??? Whatever MikeTyson said. LOL LOL.. Melvin has a winning team but we are more excited that Moody has a LOSING TEAM. LordOfDaRings is just ONE rung above LeggyPeggy for last place supremacy!! Awwwwww... That was so wrong. We shouldn't talk about Peggy like that!! My bad...... hehehehehe
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HoldMyBeers 160
HoldMyWhiskey 150
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Mikey outscored PeggyLeggy 160-150 this weekend, with Jared Golf leading the way with 25 points.... 25 points from a starting QB?????? Thats crazy.. Oh wait... What's even crazier is that Mikey outscored LeggyPeggy by 10 points, but unfortunately, they weren't even playing against each other. They play NEXT WEEK!! Oh well..... Maybe Peggy will do better next week... In other news, Mikey did actually score 160 points and his Queen actually scored a buck fiddy this week. But.... as they tend to do, they both lost. Oh well, one of them will win next week!! That we can definitively say... But wait, maybe not. They could tie!! Ask Green Bay and Dallas!! Ouch......
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daKidd 240
KC NoStars 196
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Say it ain't so???? DaKidd wins his THIRD game in a row, with a easy cruise over KC NoStars 240-196. What is going on up in HERE??? KiddiePoo has quietly edged his way up to eighth place in the standings. Which brings us to, our next segment.....................
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(being) PETTY POINTS
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BAD COMPANY
The KC-NoStars started the season on top of the mountain but my, my my have the mighty fallen. They are now kickin' it with the likes of MadDog 20/20 aka "Yo Quiero Taco Bell" and The Evil Empire at 2-5. and just a tobacco spit from PeggyLeggy at 1-6. (oops sorry Peggy. My bad) It's no wonder Yaz aka JerryJones and her partner StevieJones are currently seeking solace in the Tennessee mountains..... And speaking of "how the mighty have fallen.........................
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CRY, MOODY, CRYYYYYYYY!!!
Whats a better story? daKidd's 3-game winning streak OR NYSkyCries 4-game LOSING streak? Do yall realize that his current 4-game streak of coming up short in the points catagory is the LONGEST current streak in the league? In the now famous words of comic legend Bernie Mac "Moody. You ain't nuthin'. U ain't got nuthin' . U won't be nuthin. All you do is play records!!" LOL LOL LOL (Only a few of you will get that. Its a line from a movie. Jungle Buns definitely gets this!!) Soooooo, our suggestion to Moody is that he have his wife, a Philly native and die-hard Eagle fan, get on his DJ turntable and play that nauseating Eagle victory song "Fly Eagles Fly" but remix it to say "Cry, Moody Cryyyyyy!!!!
IN OTHER NEWS....
Peggy Leggy lost. Again. Ooopss.. Sorry Peggy. I think we already mentioned this. My bad.... LOL
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CURRENT PLANS
BigPlanz is currently in second place but, tied for first with Melvin's Victors at 6-1. Planz would get more press coverage from us, but .... to be honest... we don't even know who he (or she) is. We have no data on this manager. It is a brother or a sister? Is the manager anointed or staying here on earth with the rest of us? Is the manager black, white, blue or Mikey? lol lol... Well, wait, the jury is still out on Mikey. He acts Latino, but we think he's mixed!! LOL
DA ORIGINAL PEGGY LEGGY
Some of you may know this, most probably don't. Some may wonder why The Corral has dubbed Peggy aka Peggy's notSoMighty Team as Peggy Leggy. The original Peggy Leggy appeared in the 1974 movie "Uptown Saturday Night". See link below.....
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more #pettypoints next week! Go Peggy!!!
AND
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THE LEAD STORY 5!!
the "216"
"Hold all 216 of these!!!"
Our Lead Story is all about The 216. Not the 443. Not the 214. Not the 714. This is NOT that. This is not about area codes. THIS is about "The 216". "Lead Story" gives you the ONLY two stories that mattered, the BEST two games of the weekend, one game featuring two 4-1 teams going head to head and the other featuring a 5-0 team playing a PeeWee league 2-3 team. LOL LOL....
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And in BOTH GAMES, 216 was the winning number. The winning number of points it took for one sibling to punch out the other and for David to slay Goliath. Lets go to the videotape.....
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HoldMyBeerCansMelvin 216
Hailtoda FirstTimeLosers 215
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In what will probably go down as the first actual 1-point victory of the season (216.21 - 215.21), Mikey and His BeerCans UPSET the previously undefeated Melvin's. Whoooooo saw this coming? NObody. As in, MelvinNoBody (his league name in previous NWSL seasons).
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This game is totally hard to figure out where the one point margin of victory came from. The QBs , Hurts and Goff were basically a wash (42-40). The WR1 position was a draw (15-15), and the defenses were a wash at 44-42. It was within all the remaining players and their slim to huge margins that the 1-point difference lies. No matter where it came from, Mikey pulled off the stunner knocking Melvin off his untainted perch! Lets all stand and sing Song Number 216 entitled, "216 Cans Of Beer On The Wall!!!!" (if two of those cans should happen to fall.....Mikey loses this game after allllllll" hahhahahahahahaha.
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THE O.C. 216
JungleBuns 171
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In the "Prime Time Game of the Week" battle of 4-1 teams, THE O.C. knocked off JungleBuns in a game that turned out to be easier than predicted by the Yahoo's. In fact, the Yahoo's actually predicted the Bun's to win, but as usual, they were wrong.
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Unlike the BeerCan's game, its not hard to see where the margins of victory came in this one. O.C. quarterback Dakota Rayne Prescott got his usual 51 points, but it was the others that did major damage. DeVon Achane (47) and the Denver defense (58) (more on them later) personally stomped out the King of the Jungle. Add in a zero-burger for Bun's TE Dalton Kincaid and this turned out to be an easy win for THE O.C.
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(being) PETTY POINTS
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SNITCHES GET 45 STITCHES
THE O.C. beat his little sister by 10 points two weeks ago, but bludgeoned his little brother by 45 last week. Maybe that would be payback for his brother ratting him out to his parents when they were kids....... One thing about Kim. She might have been a royal pain in the behind, BUT she never snitched....
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KEEP LAUGHIN
And for those of you who scoffed at THE O.C. for drafting Denver's defense in Round 7, did you realize that their defense now averages 38 points per game in our fantasy league, which happens to be higher than all the other defenses? Ask The Buns how he felt when he watched Denver put a 58-burger on him last week?
ON.. AND ON.. AND ON, AND ON.....
By the way, did you realize that THE O.C. now has the longest current winning streak, having won its last 4 games? With a toothless MadDog next on the schedule??? Somebody ask DJMoodMeister to cue up Eryka Badu's song please, the one where she says "on and on, and on and on, the beats don't stop until the trophy's won!!! (or whatever she said)..... LOL
AND DA BEAT GOES ON.. AND ON... AND ON AND ON....
Did yall realize that the NYSkylines, aka TheEvilEmpire, aka LordofDaRings has now lost 3 games in a row??? Did you also realize that FireMarshallBill, aka DiggyDoo, aka CaptainSaveACat, aka The R.C. (Replacement Commisioner) has now lost 2 games in a row? Has that EVER happened? And has it ever happened in the SAME SEASON, at the SAME TIME? And has it ever happened to the managers we most wanted it to happen to? LOL LOL LOL Somebody please ask DJMoodMeister to cue up The Whispers famous song, "And da Beat Goes On" please. (I'm over here singin' it in my head and laughing)
IN OTHER NEWS....
Leggy Peggy lost. Again.
DaBomb'ed Diggadees literally got bombed, 277-160. A 117-point margin of victory for BiggerManz. Yep, when u beat another man down by 117 licks, YOU DA MANNNN!! The matchup margins were outrageous. Ladd McConkey beat his man 30-3. Kendrick Jason Bourne beat Tee Higgins 33-13. Cam Skatabooo'ed to a 36-5 beatdown of his matchup. "To Be, Or Not to Bijan" cooked James Cook 59-11. And throw in another 57 for Pattie Mahomey. Couldn't have happened to a better manager........ hehehehehe
daKidd won his second game in a row... That's two games he didn't think he would win after the draft...
and KC NoStars finally found someone they could beat up on....
AND
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THE LEAD STORY 4!!
Yall already know where this story begins. LOL... In the much awaited ballyhooed game between the winless oh and 4 Billyda Kidd and the 3-1 RC (Replacement Commissioner), daKidd pulled off the ULTIMATE UPSET. daKidd completely put out the Fire (Marshall) in a 222-165 beatdown. It's nearly like daKidd saved up all his pent up emotions for THIS GAME.... Let's go to the videotape.
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The tape does not begin at 7pm Thursday night when NFL football kicked off. It really began on Draft Night. By now, all of our readers know the story. daKidd's star receiver, Cedarian Lamb was awarded him in Round 1 of the draft. daKidd screamed foul, believing in his little heart that Cedarian was a R2 keeper. The RC submitted proof that CD was a first round keeper but daKidd screamed foul, reported it as a conspiracy and accurately foretold that his season was officially doomed.
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And doomed it started out, losing the first four games, (but NOT because of getting CD in round 1).
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So we waited patiently to see how this matchup would go. And with great glee, we watched as daKidd got his revenge....
We laughed when Danny Dimes outgained Jayden Daniels, Diggy's favorite QB (and Commodore) on the planet, 38-35. Lets throw this little bit of shade in there folks. daKidd's first, oops, second round starting WR didn't even play. daKidd said "U gave him to me in the wrong round. So guess what? I will beat you WITHOUT HIM". So what does daKidd do? He starts Commodore WR, Deeeee-Bo Sanders in his place and Deebo outscores his matchup 25-7. Ohhh, it gets better! Diggys TE, Zach Ertz goes for zero points. AND HE PLAYED!! And, he plays for guess who? The Commodores!! Diggys hometown team. And finally, to throw salt in the victory, daKidd's RB, Rico Dowdle, a former COWBOY goes for 55 points!!!
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You couldn't have scripted this better. And THAT'S why I had to do this Lead Story, even though I only have one good eye! It was worth squinting at the screen to do this one..... and guess what?
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There's no Phantom Menace out there messing with StatTracker at 3am Tuesday morning that will give Diggy 58 points! If THAT happens, daKidd will have the entire league, minus Diggy, screaming Conspiracy!!!!!!!
THE LEAD STORY 3!!
Lemme show U sumthin!!!
WHAT THA......???????
How many of you remember the classic 80's movie "Friday" staring Ice Cube and Chris Tucker? The one where Ice Cube asked Smokey, "how do you get fired on your day OFF?" Well, after last night's NWSL20 action, we have a new question that will go down as a classic. How do you win a game (that you were losing) on your day OFF?" Hey, I may not be able to see so good anymore, but I darn well can see a conspiracy when I smell one!! THIS RIGHT HERE makes you definitely shake your head, and left KC's No-Stars manager YazzyYaz asking "where is Kama when you need him!!". Lets go to the videotape....
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We start on Sunday where KC got an absurd 70 points from their Viking defense. Adding to that was another 43.9 points from the non-Canadian Drake, aka Drake Maye. I'm still trying to figure out how she went into the Monday nighter TRAILING F.M.B. 227-220. But not to worry. KC had Derrick "BatteringRam" Henry playing on Monday night and it was a lock that he would rush KC past FMB (FireMarshallBill) .
IMPORTANT FACT: FMB had zero players on the field Monday night. His team had put on their pink bed slippers and were all comfy and sleep in their little beds!!! And lo and behold, at the stroke of 11pm, Derrick O. Henry had scored 11 points, pushing KC to a 231- 227 victory. There was joy in the KC household. Yaz whipped out the batter and made pancakes. Cory went into his Michael Jackson "Billy Jean" dance routine. Barkley the Dog was rewarded with premium dog biscuits!! Meanwhile in Mudville, Diggy was not dancing a jig. All he could do was turn off the TV, with no reason to watch the rest of the game. He had lost. Final score: KC's No/Stars 231. DiggyD00 227. Yaz drank her Moscato, put rollers in her wig, tossed her bonnet on, hugged Barkley The Dog, and went to sleep.
Then........ the Tuesday morning sun came up. Yaz woke up, took her hair out of her bonnet, unrolled her rollers and repositioned her wig. Cory ate left over pancakes and went to work. Barkley The Dog was under the bed, licking spilled Moscato off the floor. Yaz wiped the crust out of her eyes, and logged into her laptop to see how far up the standings StatTracker pushed her. And then it happened. She looked in disbelief, let out a "what in the Sam tarnation!!!!" happened!!?? Which brings us back to the question, "How do you win a game (that you LOST) on your day OFF?" How do you WIN a game that all your players slept through? You do so when the StatTracker Goblin creeps through the early A.M. hours, looks over all the scores, and for whatever reason, reaches out and either takes away points from a team, or in THIS case, GIVES 6 points to F.M.B. thereby, TushPushing him to a 233-231 win.
Men, Kim and Peggy, we don't believe in Christmas but if we did, THIS was definitely an early gift to Diggy. How did this happen? A deep dive into StatTracker Goblin revealed that Diggy's defense, Ironically, KC (Kansas City) was awarded 6 points for a blocked kick that was not recorded on Sunday. I smell a rat. Diggy was in a deep sleep, slobbering on his pillow while dreaming of rescuing cats from trees. He didn't even throw a challenge flag, yet StatTracker's 3am Goblin figured a way to award him six points..... Diggy won a game with his players enjoying a day/night off!!!! FireMarshall Bill basically told KC/NoStars; "Lemme Show U Sumthin'" then proceeded to show them how to win a game without any players on the field!!!
So once again, F.M.B. finds himself the central figure in a conspiracy. The "Draft Night Conspiracy" where CeDarion DeLeon Lamb somehow (in daKidd's estimation) landed in the second round instead of the first, and now the "6 Block" conspiracy. Can't wait for the game between K.C. and daKidd, which will be the PrimeTime Game OF The Week that we will call "The Conspiracist Bowl"............. May the most cheated manager win!!! LOL LOL....
LFFFF